Happy Birthday

I don’t remember whether it’s real or not, but it surely happened. I wasn’t young, in spite of what they say, I was even kind of old already. Not as young as I’m now, for sure. I still could fear. I can’t remember the whole scene but one thing is for certain, it was damn hot. Not only did the sun warm us up, you did play a big role in it too; I remember this dress you wore. And I remind them calling you a whore. They merely had no idea about how bright you are. I don’t even think they ever tried to know. That’s what killed me back then, that too, I can recall. It just turned my stomach inside out every time I could feel their ugly thoughts. It didn’t matter much that they never explicitly expressed them, couldn’t you tell too? I’m sure you could and, that too, was unbearable. It was hot. So were you. And they were there, telling us those things I just couldn’t hear. Better preventing than curing. I just anticipated. I couldn’t hear I just shot I didn’t hear. I didn’t hear them screaming I didn’t hear you crying I didn’t hear you yelling I couldn’t hear anything I just felt like it was ok, just ok. At that time, that moment, it was simply normal. I no longer could stand them and their dirty judgments. It all started the morning already, when the others told you they missed you. How much could they love you to miss you? Can you ever miss someone you love? That’s where it all began, they said they missed you and I just wanted to kill them. “You’re not a bird but he surely is your cage”, they told you once. How poetic was that. They certainly were funny people. This day I tell you, this day I was too old. Damn afraid I was, back then. That day I was just younger than I'm never been before. And I just shot. I just couldn’t help and stand and hear and feel and believe anymore. It’s terrible to believe when you’re not sure; it’s just unbearable to believe sometimes. I was being too strict with you and they were missing you. I was your cage and they loved you they missed and loved you. They just had no idea about anything, I tell you. And I just love you.

Comments

[Mitra]

khoube. doustesh dashtam